Malarkey

Once Upon a Time in Phuket is an incredibly nice comedy. The entire premise might be absolutely classic and not really differentiated from an array of other romcoms, but in my opinion, the execution definitely deserves five stars; thanks to the movie characters, thanks to the actors, the atmosphere and the environment. An amazing movie that served its purpose – it lifted my spirits.

I don’t know any other movie saga that got its ass kicked as much as Universal Soldier did. The first movie was a decent sci-fi and, in turn, the second movie was an awful sci-fi. The third one was movie garbage that was getting completely off its tracks. And the fourth movie? That movie must have been made in some other galaxy. I haven’t seen such a weird, psychedelic and freaky movie in a long time. Van Damme and Lundgren are playing second fiddle in this movie, as expected. They passed the baton to Adkins and Arlovski who did a really great job. In any case, the story was absolutely otherworldly, just like the execution. The hallucinogenic effects started to kick in in the fourth of the movie already as the screen started flickering a lot and I thought that my head was about to explode. Everything was very absurd, but on the other hand, all of the scenes had an incredible charm that almost hypnotized me and put me in limbo. I think that David Lynch would enjoy this movie a lot. The cherry on top was the movie’s story flow that looks like it’s from a computer game. At first, Adkins doesn’t know what’s going on, then he does and by the end, he enjoys a completely amazing action scene as he first gets ambushed by Dolph Lundgren and then Jean Claude Van Damme, too. I wasn’t getting it and I didn’t even get it in the end, but the action scenes were really fun. I consider Scott Adkins the ace of contemporary action movies and I hope that he gets more opportunities, maybe even in bigger, commercial projects.

Once you turn the TV on and there’s a movie about four completely different families in America in which they are getting ready for Thanksgiving in their own ways and so there’s some proper food on the screen every now and then, there’s no hesitation. Especially when you love food. White people, Black people, Latinos and Vietnamese people prepare tons of really mouth-watering food, all while an inconspicuous story’s going on in the background, connecting all four families. It was nice. I really wanted to eat all that food off the screen. I’ve probably never wished more for that TV remote that I’ve been dreaming of in my childhood and that would materialize everything I see on the TV.

When I was watching this movie, I somehow came to the opinion that Canada can take even a decent premise and sink it in the ash heap of history. Edwin Boyd: Citizen Gangster could have been an interesting movie, Max Richter made the perfect background music for it and the actors weren’t that bad, but it’s just boring. The filmmaking is awful and at times, it’s impossible to watch. Despite the fact that the premise wasn’t bad at all. But that’s not the first time I’ve seen that when it comes to Canada.

Restless is a movie that’s very similar to 50/50. Very charismatic actors, an interesting life story and especially that final joy of life takes it a level higher, for sure. It was very pleasant to watch and if I’m ever feeling blue, this movie is definitely the first one I watch, because I know it’ll definitely lift my spirits. I mean, especially Mia Wasikowska has been uplifting, because her optimistic character was incredibly great.

Michael C. Hall seemed like a great basis for this movie. But the end result is something completely useless and I wouldn’t have missed anything if I hadn’t watched it. At least I cleaned my computer, cleaned around the house and fixed whatever I could during the movie. That’s all this movie’s good for.

A very pleasant movie that doesn’t answer everything I’d like it to answer. In any case, it’s a must for Harry Potter fans and once you live your entire life in Harry Potter’s years and the character ages along with you, it makes you think about it all. Would Harry Potter have come to life if J. K. Rowling hadn’t gone through all that she’s gone through? Everything’s just a huge coincidence that created something that our generation will think about for the rest of their lives.

I must admit that I only gave this that one star to reward that the authors attempted to create the perfect Prague atmosphere, but those cameras that filmed it haven’t even brushed up against Prague. Those Czech signs and the spirit of Czech streets is just not enough to turn the set into Czech Republic. That’s simply not possible. Everything else was wrong and the worst thing about it was the fact that it was awful, truly awful three hours of boredom.

A movie about life, about everyday reality, problems that need solving and about not surrendering life like it’s some stupid game of tag. 50/50 is a great movie, a brutal tear-jerker, but it was very pleasant to watch. Especially because of the actors who were being just the way I want to know them; being true to themselves and distinctive. Everything in this movie was the right fit and once again, I was able to watch a movie that results in a tremendous joy of life. And that’ll really lift your spirits…

Crazy, insane, foolish… and fun.